I feel like I'm in purgatory. I am miserable. I am suffering. Not about life, but about my art.
Why are artists so tough on themselves. It's not as if I don't KNOW that I'm being tough on myself. It's just that I can't seem to help myself. I look at my ArtPrize entry and I cringe.
I wonder to myself, "what was I thinking?" I should just stick to metal. I'm not a painter. At. All.
{ slump }
It comes down to a choice. It always does doesn't it?
Who do I listen to?
The voice that comes from years of failure. The voice that rises from high school art rooms and college art critiques. The voice of others.
The voice that comes from years of failure. The voice that rises from high school art rooms and college art critiques. The voice of others.
Or do I listen to the voice of my Creator, the greatest artist of all time. The One who made me as I am. The One who says I am enough because He is enough.
I like to envision Him smiling at me when the brush is in my hand. Nodding his head as the paint flies over the canvas.
Not because he thinks I'm good. But because he loves when I embrace my talent.
Not because I deserve his, or anyones, praise. But because he knows I have joy in my heart when I paint.
So I choose.
I choose the voice that comes from the One within me. I choose to know that I love this piece of art, because I loved creating it. I loved embracing color. I loved blending. I loved the call of blue that I answered to...and boldly. I love the dance of metal across the canvas.
I love that it is NOT about what others think. It's ultimately what I think.
And isn't that what art should be?
Therefore I step beyond my personal purgatory...confidently. Choosing to listen to my heart. I may not be a "painter" so to speak, but I AM an artist. I create because I cannot help myself, it IS who I am. And I'm ok with that.
What is your heart telling you? And whose voice will you choose to listen to?
BE creative (because it is a gift!)
~ lisa
Is it even what I think that should be my guide? I am so easily swayed. Or is it what the Lord thinks that is really where we find our joy?
ReplyDeleteI love your painting and I love it more because it was made by you, my friend that I love. How much MORE must HE love it?!
Knowing that makes my heart SOAR! :) Lisa~
Great post friend! I just had a similar convo with my art students this past week when one of them told me they were a bad artist. By the end of sharing my perspective of art and where our gift comes from and Whom it reflects, he leaned over to me and said, "Well, I am kinda a good sketcher." :)
ReplyDelete~Kristin
I am so excited to see this in person - I know its going to be amazing!
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ReplyDeleteWe serve a CREATIVE God (just look at our world!!), and the creativity He has imparted to us shouldn't be measured by what other "artists" thinks of it...but by what God thinks of it as we express ourselves through our creativity. He made us who we are, us as creative beings, and I think it pleases Him when we ignore those rumblings of the people around us and focus on the beauty created on the canvas in front of us.
ReplyDeleteOk, that was my deep thought for the day.
I cannot wait to see your exhibit at ArtPrize and seriously hope I FINALLY get to meet you in person! And maybe I'll remember to bring you some chocolate, because that makes everybody feel better about their artist-jitters. ;)
Oh, do I ever hear those self-doubts! They tend to hush me, but you're right, our Creator would not want us hushed and our brushes (gardening trowel, knitting needles...) to be still. Thank you for this post. I needed it today.
ReplyDelete"Not because he thinks I'm good. But because he loves when I embrace my talent." <--- so perfectly stated.
ReplyDelete(And not that you *need* human gratification, but it is nice to have: I love the paintings!)
Oh, how I needed to read this post! Not only is God the greatest artist and ultimate Creator, but he took risks. He took risks in zebras and potato bugs. He took risks in flamingos and kangaroos. Why am I so scared to take risks? Why do I start to listen to that voice. ("That" said with distain.) I know The Voice is the one to listen to. I create for my joy. God likes to see me joyful. He wants me to create! My heart tells me so. I shall listen.
ReplyDeletewhere is your painting going to be????????? my friend will have a sculpture at the amway grand-by the stairway.
ReplyDeletecm
Well just from looking at the sneak peek photos you posted, let me reassure you that not everyone can paint like that!!! You rock girl!!
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