Birthdays. Turning 45. And being grateful.

Seriously. Forty five. 45. Now matter how I write it those numbers stare at me as if they are written in another language. And if not another language they must be pertaining to someone else…not me. I still remember being 5…and 15…and 25…vividly. I just can't believe that many years have already passed me by. 

I don't look at is as old, it really isn't. And I don't feel "old", older maybe, but that's just life. I DO look at it as time that has passed that I may have potentially wasted. I think that frightens me the most. The what if's? The moments I may have missed. The opportunities that swept by because I was too busy to notice. The smiles I didn't' see. The tears I didn't wipe. The friends I didn't make. Too busy. Too preoccupied. Too self centered. Moments gone. 

Ok, so that was a bit "debbie downer depressing", let's move on shall we? Instead of looking back, or lamenting the past I want to be thankful…because I truly AM thankful. So here are my top 45 reasons I am thankful…today.

1. I am thankful for Jesus.
2. I am thankful for grace and forgiveness.
3. I am thankful for 45 years of growing and struggling and learning and becoming the woman that I am.
4. I am thankful for a husband who loves me for me.
5. I am thankful for my four beautiful children who are amazing, intelligent, funny and incredibly strong willed.
6. I am thankful for my parents who raised me to be a tenacious, confident woman who loves the Lord.
7. I am thankful to my in-laws for gifting me with a wonderful man who I love dearly.
8. I am thankful to a sister who I look up to. She is incredibly beautiful inside and out.
9. I am thankful for chocolate. Duh.
10. I am thankful for doughnuts. Don't judge.
11. I am thankful for red wine in the winter and white wine in the summer.
12. I am thankful for my creativity which allows me to do what I love every single day.
13. I am thankful for my body - which I have not always loved - but I am embracing what it is, what it does for me daily, and what it's becoming as I age.
14. I am thankful for my sweet furry girls who I love spending my days with.
15. I am thankful for sunrises that inspire me in the morning.
16. I am thankful for sunsets that take my breath away in the evening.
17. I am thankful for my BFF Deb who is always there for me and who helps me become a better ME each and every day.
18. I am thankful for my tattoos which allow me to express my heart through art on my body. Maybe I need a new one on my birthday. Just.one.more.
19. I am thankful for Indiana and its simplicity and its flatness and its people who are genuine and kind.
20. I am thankful for the Internet which allows me to excellent shopping at home.
21. I am thankful for warm days
22. I am thankful for hot cars. Not stylish. Hot. Like warm. Like almost can't breathe.
23. I am thankful for pencils.
24. I am thankful for mentors that have come into my life, encouraged me in my craft, and inspired me to strive harder and made me believe in myself. This means you Michael.
25. I am thankful for freedom.
26. I am thankful for my business and the people it has brought into my life.
27. I am thankful for my online friends who I may not see at all, or very often but whom I love dearly.
28. I am thankful for my friend Audrey who has such a beautiful soul. I could not live without her.
29. I am very thankful for peanut butter
30. Did I mention I was thankful for chocolate. If so, that's okay I'm double thankful.
31. I am also thankful for red Swedish fish, particularly the larger ones.
32. I am thankful for peaceful quiet days at home that allow me to reflect and listen and be still.
33. I am thankful for horses - I only wish I had one of my own.
34. I am thankful for crisp fall days - do they have to turn into winter?
35. I am NOT thankful for snow. Except on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. That's it.
36. I am thankful for water - the sustenance of life
37. I am thankful for minions. I only wish I had more.
38. I am thankful for nature which inspires me on even my darkest of days.
39. I'm thankful for antidepressants which help me get through those darkest days.
40. I am thankful for "real" school. Who knew what I was missing all those years of homeschooling.
41. I am thankful for music. It inspires my creativity in ways nothing else can.
42. I am thankful for boots. My wardrobe would not be the same without you.
43. I am thankful for the feeling of warm pavement after a long winter.
44. I am thankful for my gorilla arms. Thank you Robyn for complimenting my arms and allowing me to embrace all that they are for the very first time.
45. I'm thankful for each of you took the time to read this list because that means you care about me in some way (or you were bored).

So there you go. Happy birthday to me. 45 is going to be a very good year. I'm standing tall…in very high heels…I'm reaching for the stars…and expecting great things!

xoxooxoxox

lisa